Active Listening
Listen to understand—reflect, clarify, summarize.
Explanation
Most conversations fail because people wait for their turn to talk instead of truly listening. Active listening means focusing completely on understanding the other person's message and emotions. It builds trust because people feel valued when heard. Research shows we typically remember only 25% of what someone tells us, but active listening dramatically improves this.
Real-World Example
Bad: Person explains problem, you immediately offer solution. Good: 'Let me make sure I understand... You're frustrated because the deadline moved without consultation, which affects your other commitments. Is that right?' They feel heard, might even solve their own problem while clarifying.
How to Apply
Stop multitasking. Make eye contact. Don't interrupt. Reflect: 'What I'm hearing is...' Clarify: 'When you say X, do you mean...?' Summarize: 'So the main points are...' Ask: 'What else?' Watch for emotions behind words. Your goal: They say 'Yes, exactly!' to your summary.